Such a Beautiful Life
by bluferret
Summary: Guess who sits behind Sarah and I in potions? He-Who-Will-Never-Be-Named-In-This-Diary-Again-And-Is-Somehow-Head-Boy and Black! I am about to turn around and slap Black if he continues throwing paper bits in our hair- One more bloody piece and I swear...
1. Compulsive Liar

**This diary belongs to:  
**Lilly Evans, Hogwarts, year 7

**August 21, 10 p.m.  
Sarah's kitchen  
**  
This morning as my friend Sarah sails and I were chatting about our new year at Hogwarts, an owl flew in and dropped a letter in my lap. I was so stunned I leapt up in surprise. I t was from James."OOHH your admirer!" teased Sarah. I sighed and wrote a response on a sheet of note paper which read "LEAVE ME ALONE!" I gave the note from James to the owl with my note tucked inside...I really don't give a damn as to what HE has to say, he is so full of himself.

**August 21, 10:10 p.m.  
Sarah's room**

Sarah once asked me if she could date James...I could barely keep from screaming to her "WHAT, YOU THINK I WOULD REALLY CARE!" but managed to say instead "yeah whatever..."the nerve of her, she's dated so many hogwarts students you can't expect her to keep a boyfriend for more than a week.

**August 21, 10:12 p.m.  
Sarah's room**

I just remembered the worst boyfriend she ever had... Sirius! I still can't get the picture of them snogging out of my head! HELP! S.O.S! ERLACK! HACK!

**August 22, 11 a.m.  
Sarah's living room**

Sarah and I were walking to her room (I'm staying at her house this hols) breakfast in hand when we spyed her brother soaking wet opening the closet door...NAKED! We screamed so loud the neighbors called and complained! (her parents are muggles too) He turned towards us blushed crimson and dashed into the bathroom, we burst into fits of laughter!

**August 22, 9.p.m Sarah's room**

Sarah is sending one of her friends across the street an e-mail,she wants them to come over. I am making a point to ignore her as she has a tendancy to say what she writes aloud, I shall now turn the radio up a notch to drown out her voice...

**August 22, 9:20 p.m.  
Sarah's room  
**  
Well Sarah's friend is in the bathroom and Sarah is in the kitchen getting a drink...I have officially finished packing for hogwarts, in 3 days we will be back in school, Im not sure whether to be excited or upset, hhhmmm...EEEEEKKK a spider crawled over my hand EEEEEWWWW!

**August 23, 8:49 a.m.  
Sarah's room**

A stupid owl just flew in the window...you know he looks like the one from a few days ago... OH MY GOD it is the owl from a few days ago...That damn Potter!

**August 23, 8:55 a.m.  
Sarah's room**

A BIRTHDAY CARD? How on earth does HE know were Im staying let alone my birthdate? unless...SARAAAHHH!

**August 23, 1:30 p.m.  
Sarah's porch**

I am giving Sarah the silent treatment. She thinks I should be with James...I know she fancies him...but come on, he is soooo immature! She is sitting beside me trying to convince me that her giving him my address was a good thing, as well as trying to read over my shoulder...GO AWAY SARAH! NO,I WILL NOT TALK TO YOU EVER AGAIN! I AM BEING RATIONAL YOU ARE THE ONE BEING IRRATIONAL! Thank god, she went inside finally, my pencil tip is wearing down...

**August 24, 3 p.m.  
Diagon Alley  
**  
I am such a liar! I told Sarah if she did my school shopping I would forgive her...so I gave her my list and sat on this bench. Sure enough I can see her running around retrieving our things, so I guess I will have to talk to her again...someone is reading over my shoulder...

**August 24, 3:15 p.m.  
Diagon Alley**

It was Sirius, he plopped himself next to me,put his arm over my shoulder and asked if I had spoken to James lately. I glared at him and told him icely to get lost...He told me the bench I was sitting on was where the Marauders always met. The nerve... I glared at him and stalked off to the bench across from him, he only smirked at me...

**August 24, 6:06 p.m.  
Sarah's bathroom**

Sarah is a nut, I mean I always thought she was, but she has definetely out done herself this time. She was carrying our supplies and screaming at the top of her lungs "LILLY LOVES JAMES!" I flung around and stared at her. James and his entourage were laughing, as James called out "DO YOU REALLY?" I glared at him and spat "YOU WISH!" Then I stalked up to Sarah and said "I lied, I refuse to speak to you!" She's at the door begging and pleading for forgiveness as I write...

**August 24, 9:08 p.m.  
Sarah's lawn  
**  
I have once again lied, OH NO! am I becoming a compulsive liar? I made Sarah carry me piggyback to the grocery store down the street and buy me some gum...so once again I must forgive her... Oh yes and how could I forget, it was raining as well, heh heh! Wait, I got wet too, didn't I...Ahh, well, cest la vie!

**August 24, 9:56 p.m.  
Sarah's living room**

Sarah's brother just walked in, saw us and retreated to the kitchen, I dared her to follow him and comment on the scene we saw a few days ago!

**August 24, 10 p.m.  
Sarah's room**

Sarah's brother yelled at her to "STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY BUSINESS!" To which she dumbly replied "Why would I want to screw you?" Her brother growled " THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT YOU WHORE!" She stared at him and sounded as if she would slice his throat as she replied cooly " I am a virgen." "SURE YOU ARE!" he yelled, just as her mother stormed downstairs and screamed, "SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP, YOU'VE WOKEN THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD! " then on a lighter note she smiled and said " You kids ought to go to bed school starts tomarrow..." I swear her mother scares the crap out of me...

**August 25, 8:30 a.m.  
Mrs. sails' car**

We are on our way to platform 9 and 3 quarters, well almost anyway. Sarah keeps making faces through the window at cars we pass by... some people wave, others glare, a few made faces back and one flicked her off! Serves her right distracting people like that, I laughed and she hit my shoulder playfully.

**August 25, 10:59 a.m.  
Hogwarts Express head boy/girl cabin**

I CAN NOT BELIEVE IT! I WILL NOT MAKE IT THROUGH THE YEAR...JAMES IS HEAD BOY! WHO ON EARTH MADE THAT DECISION...He is staring at me now as I write furiously, "what's wrong Evans, surprised to see me? " he asks. I will glare at him now and think of a good comeback...

**August 25, 11:03 a.m  
Hogwarts Express, Sarah and Evelyn's cabin**

He laughed and laughed and laughed at my flustered look, I've stormed off to see my friends. As he shouts after me "See you soon Evans!" I swear the nerve of him...Evelyn, oh how marvelous it is to see her again, her bubbly spirit always cheers me up.

**August 25, 11:52 a.m.  
Hogwarts dining area  
**  
Thank the heavens, Evelyn rambled on about her dog dying the entire ride, I swear I never thought she could frown untill today...OH MY GOD now she's crying. Oh great,  
now all the students are staring our way, quick Sarah get her to the bathroom! Oops did I write that? I meant to say it...

**August 25, 8 p.m.  
Head boy/girl common room**

Poor Poor Evie (Evelyn) Apparently her aunt, whom was her legal gaurdian died as well, so she's living with her depressed uncle. I want to help yet I don't know how...Damn! James just walked in with Sirius and Remeus completely breaking my concentration with their loud laughter."HELLO!" I just hollered ,"SOMEONE IS TRYING TO THINK!" " Wow Lilly chill we come in peace." Sirius laughed.

**August 25, 8:02 p.m.  
Head girls room  
**  
Anyway I glared at him and stormed to my room, as I heard Potter say " Nice going padfoot!" Harrumph to those fools...Remeus seems sensible at least...Wait What! None of those marauders are anything but trouble...James does seem a bit less...what am I thinking! Brain STOP! Sirius seems less obsessed about girls too...NOOOO help I can not think these thoughts AAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!


	2. Apple Cider

**August 26, 7:30 a.m.  
Head Girls Dorm  
**  
Last night I invited Sarah and Evie to my room so we could cheer up the Sad One of the trio...But SOMEONE whose name will never be written in my diary again, stormed over, banged on the door and said we were being extremely loud. To which Sarah replied " Want to come in and make it louder?" He only snorted...

**August 26, 11:29 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

Great, just great, most of my classes just have to include He Whose Name Will Never Be Written Here Again! I swear you would think someone purposely did this...Wait a minute...Why is that immature fool Head Boy in the first place? I see a connection somewhere, here...

**August 26, 11:32 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

For some very odd reason, I feel like someone has an odd intention, besides head duties...WHY IS THAT FOOL HEAD BOY! I must find out...

**August 26, 7 p.m.  
Girls Dorm C**

I am going insane, there is no reason whatsoever that that PERSON should be head boy, Is there?

**August 27, 8:22 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

I am soooo beyond disgusted. Sirius spewed apple cider all over Evelyn and I, as he laughed at Remus because of a facial expression, I will now go and hurl...

**August 27, 2:34 p.m.  
Potions**

Just guess who sits behind Sarah and I, go on guess! He Who Will Never Be Named In This Diary Again And Is Somehow Head Boy and Black! I will soon turn around and slap Black, he's throwing paper bits in our hair. One more piece and I swear... AAAARRRRGGGGGHHH! Okay he is so going to get it!

**August 27 ,5:30 p.m.  
Head Girl's Dorm**

Okay, so I didn't hit him...in class. Right when we were in the hall I slapped him, HARD. He winced and said, " I did not deserve that!" Sarah then marched up to him and kicked him were it counts while saying," I guess you didn't deserve that either!". I think he needs to go to the nurse...

**August 28, 8:01 a.m.  
Heads Common Room**

I thought I would lounge here peacefully, when in came He Who Will Never Be Named In This Diary Again And Is Somehow Head Boy and his pals. YAY. NOT! For lack of anything better to do, I will now eavesdrop...

**August 28, 8:45 a.m.  
****Head Girl's Dorm**

Bad, Bad, BAD idea, they were talking of...girls. Although I think it was only to get rid of me...Perhaps I will stand at the end of the hall instead.

**August 28, 9:10 a.m.  
Transfiguration**

Odd, Evelyn is missing, I hope she isn't sulking in the loo again...

**August 28, 10:43 a.m.  
Potions**

Evelyn is still missing, soon Sarah and I must worry...

**August 28, 11:15 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

Sarah and I are worrying...

**August 28, 4:11 p.m.  
****Quidditch Field**

Sarah and I have searched and searched to no avail... the loos, the dorms, the lawn, EVERYWHERE. Sarah says we should enlist in the aid of the Marauders, since they know more passages then we do...SURE, like I would ever ask He Who Will Never Be Named In This Diary Again And Is Somehow Head Boy for help!

**August 28, 8:55 p.m.  
****Somewhere in Hogwarts...**

We asked for thier help...well actually Sarah did and I laid low with a frown on my face, but you know. He Who Will Not Be Named In This Diary Again And Is Somehow Head Boy flashed me a grin and said "So Lilly Evans needs my help?", I ignored him. Anyhow here we are, split up searching the school for Evelyn, I am so going to get her for this! I am so lucky to be stuck with He Who Will Never Be Named Again In This Diary And Is Somehow Head Boy and Sirius...DAMN, who am I kidding? This is hell, SAVE MEEEEE!


	3. Duffings

**August 27, 3 a.m.  
Head Girl's Dorm**

We finally found Evie...IN THE KITCHENS! She was lounging about, stuffing her face with pie and chocolate frogs! A passing elf told me she'd eaten five pies and 20 frogs...SHE SKIPPED CLASSES TO STUFF HER BLOODY GOB! WHAT THE FUCK, she's so thin how'd she fit it all in there?

**August 27, 7:10 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

That girl is going to get a duffing! Six...SIX people already came up to me and asked if I was 'feeling well because I looked so horrible'. WELL, THEY WOULD TOO IF THEY STAYED UP UNTILL 4 A.M. SEARCHING FOR A FRIEND WHOM WAS STUFFING HER BLOODY GOB! I didn't even finish my homework...I will now fling some potatoe salad at her...

**August 27, 11:25 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

Evelyn hasn't noticed the silent treatment Sarah and I are giving her...Actually, she's smiling like a buffoon over a joke Sarah said...to me...

**August 27, 2:20 p.m.  
Transfiguration**

She still hasn't noticed...Hello? What's this...NNNOOO! PLEASE NO! A quiz? When was this anounced? It's about yeterdays homework...WHICH I DIDN'T DO! I'M GOING TO FAIL, SAVE MEEE!

**August 27, 8:08 p.m.  
Library**

I would be doing extra credit right now, but Sarah won't shut up! We're still ignoring Evie, apparently bieng quiet all day has made Sarah an incoherent blubbering mess... Perhaps I'll whack her with my potions book?

**August 28, 7:11 a.m.  
Girl's Dorm C**

Evie has finally been persuaded, the only way Sarah and I will forgive her is if she stands in the middle of the main hall and screams "SARAH SAILS AND LILLY EVANS ARE THE BEST!" Although I do feel like I'm stooping to Potter's...ummm he who shall never be named again in this diary and is somehow head boys' level...well, It's to late for that now! I've got to see this...

**August 28, 7:20 a.m. Dining Hall**

I hope Evie isn't too embarrassed...she is red as a tomatoe! (I really shouldn't use cliches...) It was absoloutely hilarious, she called out her name instead of ours! Everone stared at her as if she had gone off her rocker... Maybe some of Bertie's beans will cheer her up! they work for meee!

**August 28, 10:05 a.m.  
Potions**

Remus just approached me and said "Lilly people change, you know?" I'm pretty sure I stared at him for a while before saying "Yeah, whatever." What was he getting at?

**August 28, 2:12 p.m.  
Transfiguration**

WHY? WHY? WHY? Did he say that? WHO? WHO? WHO? Was he implying? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? Did he mean. It's driving me crazy...I must know! I mean...What did she just say? who aced the quiz? NO! I heard wrong, I must have, right? I mean it's impossible...POTTER ACED THE DAMN QUIZ! HE ACED IT! HE DOESN'T EVEN DO HIS HOMEWORK UNLESS I'M BLIND! QUESTIONING MY SANITY SEEMS LIKE A VERY GOOD IDEA RIGHT ABOUT NOW!

**August 28, 2:33 p.m.  
Transfiguration**

I caught him staring at me and glared at him and you know what he had the nerve to do? GRIN! Now I know I've gone insane!

**August 29, 6:31 a.m.  
Head Girl's Dorm  
**  
Sweet sunshine...I LOVE YOU! I think I'll dance around my room... better yet I'll jump on my bed! This will be a great day, I can feel it!

**August 29, 7:21 a.m.  
Lavatory**

Scratch that... This will be a horrible day...HORRIBLE! Sirius levitated a tub of punch over my head and voila instant shower...He claimed he was aiming for Peeves...PLEASE! Anyone who knows anything, knows that Peeves is a ghost...INCLUDING HIM! You know what he asked me afterwords? "Do people change Lil?" I did my best not to strangle him or scream as I hissed (I'm pretty sure it was a hiss, anyway) " Yeah, But obliviously not fucking assholes like you!" He and the other Marauders gaped at me... I wonder why?

**August 29, 12:23 p.m.  
Divination**

OOOOHHHH I now why they gaped ... I've never sworn in front of anyone except Sarah before...Maybe I should do it more often?

**August 29 10:11 p.m.  
Heads Common Room  
**  
Sarah is yakking about her new boyfriend, you'd think she's known him forever the way she's talking...Thier first date is tomarrow! She'll break up with him by next week, believe me! Sarah the heartbreaker...she really ought to date Sirius again...it was quite intresting seeing two heart breakers dating! Evie agrees... she's reading over my shoulder...EVIE! YOUR BOTHERING MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN? THEY ARE?

**August 29 10:20 p.m.  
Heads Common Room**

The Marauders were speaking in LOUD voices about change...I basically listened for a bit, stormed over, and told them to shut up...Why change? Are they trying to tell me something? Why don't they just say it? TELL ME NOW! I seriously want to murder them...


	4. Quiz Time

**August 30, 9 a.m.  
Head Girl's Dorm**

Evie and Sarah have been getting ready for Hogsmeade for the last two hours! What are they doing highlights? This to shall pass Lily, This to shall pass, relax...

**August 30, 9:45 a.m.  
Head Girl's Dorm**

SIGH...Now I really must complain! Seriously two hours and 45 minutes...What's going on in there makeovers? And why wasn't I invited? (this to shall pass, This to shall pass)

**August 30, 10:30 a.m.  
Coffee Shop**

They did it all! Manicures, pedicures, highlights, hair, everything! (they used some charms, but still!) Is this something they do because they have boyfriends? If so I really ought to find one, I want a makeover to people!...This to shall pass, this to shall pass...ARRRGGGHHH, why do I keep writing that?

**August 30, 11:15 a.m.  
Coffee Shop**

Candy, Candy, Candy! I NEED CANDY! WHAT DO YOU WANT PETER? HOW WOULD I KNOW? He asked if I knew how to change people...Wait! The marauders, they'll have candy! COME BACK! Back in a mo...

**August 30, 11:30 a.m.  
Bench**

Tee-hee, I got Candy! Oh My God! Wait, I asked POTTER for candy...Hmmm...He actually gave me some too...No strings attached...WHY? Then again I did call him James in the sweetest voice I could muster, "Jamsee, may I have some candy pweeaase?" Tee-hee I feel so evil!

**August 30, 2 p.m.  
Gryffindor Common room  
**  
The girls had an awful time...I on the other hand, quite enjoyed myself...except for the Potter part... he was the only one who gave me candy, well besides Peter. I think I'm on a sugar high...uh-oh...

**August 30, 2 p.m.  
Gryffindor Common room**

The girls had an awful time...I on the other hand, quite enjoyed myself...except for the Potter part... he was the only one who gave me candy, well besides Peter. I think I'm on a sugar high...uh-oh...Time to start a pillow fight...It always cheers me up. (Wait i'm already cheered up...But Evie and Sarah aren't! Hee-hee!)

**August 31, 9 a.m.  
Heads Common Room**

In my rightful opinion we should be able to go home on weekends, this bloody place gets so goddamn boring! What to do, what to do.

**August 31, 9:11 a.m.  
Heads Common Room**

ARRGGHHH! THERE'S NOTHING TO DO AROUND HERE! Well, now I know why Sirius is such a player...There's nothing better to do!

**August 31, 10:22 a.m.  
Heads Common Room  
**  
My mind will soon be filled with a miraculous idea of what to do...

**August 31, 11 a.m.  
Heads Common Room**

Or not, Are Sarah and Evie up yet?

**August 31, 11:15 a.m.  
Gryffindor Common Room**

Nope, back to the drawing board.

**August 31, 1:46 p.m.  
Girl Dorm C**

That's it wake-up call! I'll jump on Sarah and Evie's beds like a crazed lunatic! Bwa Ha ha! All this locked up energy has got to go somewhere...CHARGE!

**August 31 2:04 p.m.  
Girl Dorm C**

Evie was a quickie to wake up...She even hopped up on Sarah's bed with me! Sarah wasn't so easy...You know her head looks funny flopping about while she sleeps...Then of course her eyes snapped open, she got a murderous glint in her eye, tackled us off her bed and fell back asleep an the floor...There's a drool spot on the carpet...Maybe someone will step in it?


	5. Large Rats

**August 31, 3:15 p.m.  
Girl Dorm C**

We the bored girls of Gryffindor Dorms A, B and C, years 5, 6, and 7, shall hereby rate the male population of hogwarts...

Black, Sirius

Me:He's a complete player, who's never serious, and is a complete loser!  
Evelyn Perk: That was harsh wasn't it? I think he's quite hot!  
Sarah Sails:Oh, yeah! He is the best snogger ever! Not to mention way sexy!  
Christina Hooch:I love his sense of humor, plus he plays quidditch.  
Alice Marks: Sall right.  
Kimmy Abbott: I love that guy, I should go snog him sometime!  
Nadine Wood: He's the def of cool!  
Marie Turpin: I'd screw him any day...wait...I think I already did...

They are all insane.

Black, Regulus

Me: A muggleborn hater, who should rot in hell!  
Evelyn: Breathe, there Lilly, you're going awfully red...He's alright...if you like evil pricks.  
Sarah: Not nearly as good a snogger as his brother.  
Christina: He needs to be taller and he needs to be on the quidditch team!  
Alice: I'd shoose Sirius over him any day!  
Kimmy: Let's Just say he needs to be more like his brother!  
Nadine: He's a slytherin. Need I say more?  
Marie: Sirius is a way better shag!  
I don't even want to think about how she knows that.

Snape, Severus

Me: Seems inocent enough.  
Evelyn: Inocent, like I care if he's inocent! Have you looked at his hair? Way too greasy for my liking.  
Sarah: Who?  
Christina: He has got way too many problems...I think he wets.  
Alice: Disgusting! Kimmy: If he were friends with Regulus maybe i'd like him...Who am I kidding?  
Nadine:Gag me!  
Marie: He is so not my type!

Quick! Remind me why I thought he was inocent, I mean he's got greasy hair! As if! How shallow can my pallys get?

Malfoy, Luscious

Me: Total Jackass is written all over his face!  
Evelyn: Anyone who dates Narcissa needs to go to the loony bin!  
Sarah: Narcissa, the bitch! I don't talk to the likes of him, anymore!  
Christina: OOHHH! I think he's kind of hot, in that secretive,deatheater, brutal way!  
Alice: .  
Kimmy: Whatever.  
Nadine: He's so not 'it.  
Marie: I can do so much better! I mean he's on my shag wall of shame for gosh sakes!

I seriously think Marie is obsessed with sex...perhaps she's a hooker?

Weasly, Frank

Me: He is what I call wierd.  
Evelyn: Look who's talking, little miss whacko herself! I find his obsession cute!  
Sarah: I would never give him a third glance!  
Christina: Third? Umm...whateva. I find his hair tre tre atractive!  
Alice: Hello! This is my boyfriend we are talking about, at least pretend you like him!  
Kimmy: Christina, you aren't saying you're bi are you? Do you like Lilly, is her hair attractive too? I personally think he's a geek!  
Nadine: Is he not the dude obsessed with muggle studies? ERLACK, lame!  
Marie: Who gives about muggle studies look at his eyes...AHHH...

Aurther...attractive? They've gone off thier rockers!

Macnair, Marcus

Me: I think not.  
Evelyn: Ditto Sarah: Why are there so many goddamn slytherins?  
Christina: Maybe if he was a quidditch player, he'd be able to pass off as my boyfriend.  
Alice: He's okay, I guess.  
Kimmy: yawn, moving along to someone more worthwhile now.  
Nadine: He is so sexy! NOT!  
Marie: Pass...OK fine, he's horrid in bed.

What Marie said was odd...

Bagman, Ludo

Me: Way too serious.  
Evelyn: For you...and me. He needs to go out and partay, before I go out with him! Sarah: We ought to take him on a camping trip and see how he likes it!  
Christina: He's too quiet...Much too quiet...He's hiding something I tell you!  
Alice: Who cares about him?  
Kimmy: He could be considered yummy...in his next lifetime!  
Nadine: That's what you say, Kimmy,he seems mighty fine to me!  
Marie: He can so not shag properly, people! Just a forewarning, you'll ache for weeks!

Way too much info Marie! I feel sick...

Pettigrew, Peter

Me: He's too chunky...he would be cute though...in theory.  
Evelyn: He's got some good pranks up his sleeve.  
Sarah: Theory, Lilly? Please! No need to be nice, it's not like he's here! He sucks!  
Christina: I think Ludo and Peter are in cahoots! Although if he flew a broom, maybe I could look past it.  
Alice: Frank is so much better!  
Kimmy: I think he's aborable!  
Nadine: I'm going to toss my cookies in a moment here.  
Marie: Oh, god what a hopeless shag...Please stop reminding me!

I wonder if Alice and Frank are engaged...I mean they've been dating for two years!

Avery, William

Me: I don't think I've ever talked to him...But he is sooo cute!  
Evelyn: He is total eye candy! Sarah: Are you drooling? Gosh he's not that awesome, girl.  
Christina: He is obsessed with the Chudley Cannons...I hate him now!  
Alice: You're obsessed with quidditch, but that didn't stop him from asking you out!  
Kimmy: Anyhow, I find him quite atrocious...But what do I know?  
Nadine: Fuck the asshole! Do you know what that rotton mother-fu-  
Marie: Watch your mouth, geez, you know in the old days they washed peoples mouths out if you swore that much!

What was that all about, I wonder?

Lupin, Remus

Me: He is so sweet and kind and nice and-  
Evelyn: Lilly, you do realize he isn't an angel right? I mean, he's cool, but not that cool!  
Sarah: I wouldn't be so sure.  
Christina: Does he like quidditch? If he does he is so my man!  
Alice: His lankyness is a bit akward.  
Kimmy: Lankyness is so sexy! Nadine: Opinion! I wonder where he is now.  
Marie: He is an awesome snogger...But he won't go any further!

Marie really ought to get help for her obsession, sooner rather than later please!

Diggory, Amos

Me: This is not even worth commenting on!  
Evelyn: I don't think I know who he is.  
Sarah: What! You have no clue who he is? I don't believe you! Christina: Sarah, do you like Amos?  
Alice: any friend of Franks has got to be cool.  
Kimmy: Or so you think.  
Nadine: sokay, for a hufflepuff.  
Marie: He wouldn't even date me! Well, he doesn't know what he's missing!

Hufflepuffs are better than slytherin!

Potter, James

Me: As if! He such a complete and utter prat, not to mention concieted!  
Evelyn: True...Who throws around a snitch all day? But, still... Sarah: You must admit he is HOT and SIZZLING!  
Christina: He plays quidditch...i'm seeing stars!  
Alice: I've got Frank, stop trying to make me gape over some other person!  
Kimmy: Just admit he's cute...with those glasses and the hair-  
Nadine: Don't make me hurl again, please, my stomach can't take it.  
Marie: I want to shag that guy sooo much!

Nadine is my new best friend...even though she is a fifth year...

Lockheart, Gilderoy

Me: He is garunteed to be one of those newspaper reporters like Rita.  
Evelyn: Who says she's gonna get into that biz? You're probably right though, his lies get me every time!  
Sarah: He can lie to me all he wants! He is like so, so, perfect!  
Christina: I know for a fact that he's never been on a broom, the liar! Alice: His life does seem impressive!  
Kimmy: Isn't it odd how his adventures are always ocurring over summer break?  
Nadine: No.  
Marie: Not all his adventures, I've slept with him last week!

Nice to know Marie...

**August 31 6:22 p.m.  
Head Girl Dorm**

Wow blabbing about guys sure can wear a girl out...Perhaps I should eat some candy...Or take a bath...Or read a book...Or go to bed early...Yeah that sounds pretty good to me...

**Saptember 1 5 a.m.  
Head Girl Dorm**

I am never going to bed that early again...Talk about waking up far to early. Sigh. I might just make a lot of noise to wake up Mr. Potter over there. If I can't sleep niether should he! I'll throw about some books, I'll take an early shower, I'll slam the doors...Why yes that sounds quite fun! Bwa-ha-ha evil Lilly is back!

**September 1 5:45 a.m.  
Head Girl Dorm**

Why there's a pounding at my door. Whoever could it be? No, it couldn't be Mr. Potter...If it is the large carniverous rats invaded my room and stomped about for half an hour, since we all know that I would never do such a thing. At least, i'll let him think that...Alright already i'll answer the door! Sheesh, someone sounds upset!


	6. Jealousy

**September 1, ****6:00 a.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

Okay then... He grinned like buffoon and asked how many spiders were in my room...I think he was sleepwalking...

**September 1, ****6:05 a.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

Why the hell would he assume there a bunch of spiders in my room! Sure, I made a lot of noise...but spiders? His assumption lacks logic...Doesn't it?

**September 1, ****3:56 p.m.  
****Herbology**

Sirius just asked me what a Parsniffle was, talk about stupid. WE SO DID THAT IN 3RD YEAR! DON'T YOU DARE DENY IT! WELL OBLIVIOUSLY YOU NEVER PAY ATTENTION! YES, THAT WAS AN INSULT! Merlin! Some people are SOOO stupid!

**September 1, ****3:58 p.m.  
****Herbology**

Sarah just asked me what a parsniffle was, oh, the irony. Yes, it is ironic Sarah. No, I will not tell you what a parsniffle is. You should have paid attention in third year, then. I AM NOT A PRAT! JUST BECAUSE YOU DON"T PAY ATTENTION TO ANYTHING, THAT DOES NOT MAKE ME, IN ANY WAY A PRAT! OH, SOD OFF!

**September 2, ****8:30 a.m.  
****Dining hall**

HE ASKED ME OUT! He knows perfectly well how much I hate concieted prats and he asks me out! I mean, WHAT THE FUCK! How dense can you get? I was sitting here minding my own breakfast, when along comes Mr. High and Mighty. Have I not told him that he's second on my Asshole list, behind Potter? Well, he would be worse, but Potter and his snitch take the cake. AMOS DIGGORY had the nerve to ask me out! PLUS when I said no, HE SAID HE'D PAY ME! What kind of a whore does he think I am? ASSHOLE!

**September 2, ****9:15 a.m  
****Ancient Runes**

Sarah says i'm overreacting and that it's been done to her numerous times. All I could do was stare at her, I mean really. I DON'T GIVE A BLOODY DAMN IF SHE WANTS TO PLAY WHORE, BUT I DON"T! She says she never had sex, just a simple date, nothing major. I am not trash, I WILL NOT BE PAID TO DATE! Evie on the other hand says I should party and have fun. Some friends...

**September 2, ****12:56 pm.  
****Potions**

Potter just passed me a note. I will not read it. It shall remain folded on my desk for eternity, I tell you!

**September 2, ****1:28 p.m  
****Divination**

I couldn't resist. And I really should have because, it said 'O Fleur De Lis, where for art thou?' I don't think he knows... Shakespeare is like so old! As for lily flower, that is so cliche! I think i'll respond with 'Call me fleur de lis again and prepare to be drenched in pumpkin juice!' Or ' Shakespeare? As If! please get a life and keep me out of it!' Or perhaps I should send both? I think I will...

**September 2, ****3:38 p.m.  
****Herbology**

Potter is jealous of Diggory. There is no doubt about it. But why? Could it be, me? Pah! I sure as hell hope not! I mean, who writes a note that says ' Have hurling good fun on your date with the slimy, measly sixth year Diggory.' Tell me, who? A jealous person that's who! Apparently he doesn't know I refused Diggory...This could work to my advantage... Oh, how I love to torture Potter! I'll get Sarah, and Evie to help me, and Narcissa may be a good help too...

**September 2, ****3:39 p.m.  
****Herbology**

OH MY GOD! This is not happening, I just passed notes with Potter. I think I need the nurse. MS. POPPY! I NEED YOUR OPINION OVER HERE!

**September 2, ****4:58 p.m.  
****Charms**

This life is damned! Look at me, writing in my diary during my favorite class. School is so lame this week, sure it always is, but this week it's extra lame to the max. Whatever. I just want to have fun again! Perhaps Sarah, Evie, the other girls and I should have a girl's night in the dorms...Again. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

**September 2, ****9:46 p.m.  
****Girls Dorm C**

We managed to gather every girl in seventh year to camp out with us! Although, Marie already hurled from eating to many whizzbee's, Julie stormed out in a huff five minutes ago, Carla and Christi went to bed an hour ago and...HOLD UP! He-he...A brilliant idea has come to Lily! Yes! We should decorate Carla and Christi! Nail polish, hair color, face paint! The girls will love it...Well Evie and Sarah at least!


	7. Sharp Razors

**September 3, ****6:12 a.m.  
****Girls Dorm C**

The day started out like any other...Then of course Carla and Christi saw eachother...The looks on thier faces were priceless! I seriously thought about tossing a sock in Carla's mouth, it was open so wide! You know they've been in the bathroom quite a while, someone ought to see if the face paint came off. There is, after all, a week lasting charm on it! Hee-hee!

**September 3, ****9:02 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

I just recieved a letter from Pappy. Apparently Petunia ran off and eloped with Vernon. And I thought today was like any other! he'll probably fall and flatten her before the end of the day! Mom, doesn't even know about it yet, dad doesn't want to tell her, he says she'll freak. WHAT? OH...Sarah says, No, duh, who wouldn't...Wait a second! HAVEN'T I TOLD HER NOT TO READ OVER MY SHOULDER!

**September 3, ****11:56 a.m.  
****Potions**

I don't get it. Why the hell would she marry HIM? Wait...Why would I care? Serves her right to marry a buffoon like him!

**September 3, ****8:11 p.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

She's dead. Gone foever. Pappy told her about Petunia and Mom had a massive heartattack. It's not his fault. It's Petunia's. Mom had always hated Vernon, we all did. Mom always had good judgement, and Petunia knew it. She hated her for that, she swore she'd move away someday and never tell us where she went. She should have moved, she never should have told us she eloped. She killed mom, and I hate her for it.

**September 3 **

**8:20 p.m.**

**Head Girl Dorm**

I can't handle it. Every memory I have of her is swirling around me. Every single Goddamn memory's haunting me. I keep telling myself she's on vacation... She always told me that I would be more succesful than my sister. I've never believed her, everything she said seemed to be a lie. She was never all thet loving towards Petunia and I, but she did often laugh with us. I loved those rare moments, those rare happy moments. I don't even know why I care so much. I hated her at heart. She would interrogate me, every chance she got. She told me I was worthless every day. She assumed I was having sex at school, and constantly threatened to disown me. Yet, she never gave me any bruises. I never cared about what she did, or what she said. So why do I now?

**September 3, ****8:45 p.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

I swore to myself I would never do it again, but I did. I don't even remember packing it, yet there it was. So beckoning, so friendly. I knew I shouldn't. But I knew I would. I couldn't resist it anymore, I needed that familiar feeling to flow through me again. But, when I did it, it hurt. For the first time ever it truly hurt and It scared me. It never hurt this much before, it always helped me, it was always there, supporting me . Yet suddenly, it's made things worse...

**September 4, ****6:56 a.m.  
****Head Loo**

I knew this would happen. I knew I wouldn't be able to stop, I knew it. Yet here I am doing it again. The one thing that killed Marie, I am doing. The one thing, I swore to her, as she lay dying, that i'd never do again. I lied. Everything these past few weeks have been lies. I thought things were better, but they aren't, they never were...

**September 4, ****10:34 p.m.  
****Herbology**

I wish my shrink were here.

**September 4, ****12:45 p.m  
****Head Girl Dorm**

It's gone. My razor is gone. Someone must have taken it, but who? I need it now more than ever...WAIT what am I saying! I've got to stop, i've got to let go...But I can't. I know that now. For almost a year I've fooled myself, but I can't anymore. I need it. I need my razor, NOW!

**September 4, ****6:23 p.m.  
****Loo Wing 4**

Evie had it. Evie used it. Bright, bubbly Evie used my razor. Great, now i'll get AIDS and die. Frankly I don't care, if I die that is. It would be so much easier that way. But I know I can't, I promised I wouldn't.

**September 4, ****7:08 p.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

Evie says she's adopted, she says her adoptive father verbally abuses her. She says he's called her every name in the book. She says she does it to remind herself what 'true' pain is. I said nothing. I had no idea. But, who did? Who had any idea about me either? So I'll tell her about Marie, how she was my best friend, even though she was a muggle. How we'd go to parties and get tipsy. How we talked about everything. How all my firsts were with her, first boyfriend, first party, first smoke, first binge, first cut, first everything. We were headed down a bad road, we seemed to be addicted to everything, cigarettes, binging, cutting. Then one day it went to far, Marie commited suicide. I was sleeping over at her house, when I found her on the bathroom floor, soaked with blood. She wasn't screaming, she wasn't crying, she was laughing. She made me promise not to cut myself again, she told me that death hurts and I should never commit suicide, no matter how bad things were, she told me she loved me. I lost her that night. I lost everything and I gave everything up. Or so I thought. I swore never to think of or mention her again, yet I am. I'm remembering what i've tried so hard to forget.

**September 4, ****8:31 p.m.  
****Dining Hall**

Suddenly Mother's death seems so minuscule, I barely knew her, she could've been the mailman by our socializing standerds! But, Marie, I knew everything about her, everything, and she's gone. Sure it's been almost a year, but I'll never forget...Never.

**September 4, ****9:00 p.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

Found Evie in the loo again, just as I felt that familiar itch to cut. I have a feeling Evie and I are going to become closer than Sarah and I have ever been...

**September 5, ****7:41 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

I want to stop. I need to stop. I know i'm blowing things out of proportion, she's gone, deal with it. I am. But whenever I see food, I remember how well Marie could cook and it makes me want to hurl. Whenever I hear laughter, I remember her sprawled on the bathroom floor bleeding and laughing. Its's wrong, I know. Then I think of mother and how I so quickly got over her and I need the razor, to remind myself that I hated her. To remind myself how much she hurt me.

**September 5, ****11:51 a.m.  
****Loo Wing 2**

I'm becoming her again. The girl I never want to be , the girl who died with her friend last year, the girl who's threatening to burst out and take control of me. The girl who just tossed her breakfast. I did it on purpose. I didn't realize untill a moment ago, that I hadstuck my finger down my throat. It was me, all me. I can't do this again. It's no big deal. I saw someone die, it's no big deal. I will make it through the rain. And I intend to bring Evie through with me.

**September 5, ****2:47 p.m.  
****Transfiguration**

I'm so confused. How can things get so bad so quickly? Potter aproached me a few minutes ago, asking where the face paint came from. I didn't know what he was talking about untill just now. That prank seems so immature now, like it's never been funny at all. Like it was only funny, because there was nothing better to laugh about.

**September 5, ****6:43 p.m.  
****Gryffindor Common Room**

Sarah knows somethings up with me. But I don't care anymore, i'm tired of fucking happiness, i'm so tired. She's questioning me right now, i'm ignoring her. Why doesn't she just read over my shoulder? Perhaps, for once in her life, she knows when I need privacy. She just left, I didn't realize it untill the door shut. Could she be mad at me? Who knows? Evie's doing an essay, her hand's twitching. I know that twitch, she needs the razor and she needs it now. Someone must be in the bathroom. If they don't hurry I think she'll settle for doing it right here, she's shaking so violently. Amazingly, no one's noticed her shaking, they must all be fucking blind!

**September 6, ****7:14 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

I have to start eating properly. No more of this binging bullshit. I will eat my entire breakfast! I will! Watch me!

**September 6, ****7:20 a.m.  
****Loo Wing 4**

Not

**September 6, ****12:21 p.m.  
****Dining Hall**

There's no use going home for the funeral. Because there isn't one. Mom is getting cremated. I hope dad doesn't stick her on the window ledge, like he does with all of his other prized possetions. I couldn't bare remembering her spiteful words, I do after all hate her, even as her ashes lay in a vase getting moldy. Serves her right!

**September 6, ****7:41 p.m.  
****Heads Common Room**

I threw away the razor. Literally. I threw it away. I tossed it out the window. Evie says I should have given it to her, but I don't trust her not to cut to deep, I don't trust her not to commit suicide. I trusted Marie and look what happened. I couldn't handle another dead friend. I told her that. She's giving me the cold shoulder now. Well, what did I expect? Her to thank me graciously and grasp me in a bear hug? NOT BLOODY LIKELY!

**September 6, ****9:22 p.m.  
****Head Girl Dorm**

Potter found the razor. He doesn't know what it is, I can hear him showing it to his friends. I have to get it back. They can't find out it's mine. For all I know, they may show it all around school tomarrow and Evie will claim it as her own and kill herself! That will not happen!


	8. Cliques

**September 7, 9:46 a.m.  
Charms**

I'm going off my rocker. Potter hasn't said a word about the razor. I really wish he would, it would save me so much trouble...

**September 7, 10:21 a.m.  
Defense against the dark arts**

Scratch that. I think he gave it to a friend...And I have a feeling that this friend was Evie...Why? Who knows...

**September 7, 4:30 p.m.  
Heads common room**

It was Evie. This time I threw the razor in the fire, only a fool would retrieve it from there! Evie is now spreading horrid gossip about me and to think I thought we could help eachother. She obvliviously doesn't want to be helped.

**September 7, 8:14 p.m.  
Dining Hall**

So far Evie's told the entire school population that I am A. a whore B. a control freak C. a demon D. A murderer (She said i killed Marie.) I was getting over Marie again too. Sarah's trying to mend our friendship, I don't think it will ever be the same. Soon Sarah will have to choose a side, that side will be Evie's. I mean, who wants to be friends with the girl everyone considers a whore, and was accused of murder? Nobody.

**September 7**

10:00 p.m.

head girl dorm

Amos Diggory just offered me 300 galleons for a lap dance. What a perv. I was thinking about punching him, but decided to laugh instead. Always have a good attitude about goss and things will settle down, or so I keep telling myself.

**September 8, 7:18 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

Just like I thought, Sarah is avoiding both Evie and I, she obliviously senses the tension. What she doesn't know is how much tension there is. She's lucky she doesn't or she'd have a permanent headache...

**September 8, 11:57 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

Sarah found a new clique to hang in, the Ditz clique. The Oh My Merlin Were Better Than Everybody Else Clique. I wonder if she really feels that way?

**September 9, 6:56 a.m.  
Dining Hall**

Evie hanging with different friends in the Goth Clique. Everybody in it batters themselves up in some way: Anorexia, Bulimia, Cutting, Depression, you name it someone has it. Well? What about me? I'm now officially a loner. It's too bad to, cause I feel in a pretty good mood today...I wouldn't mind going to Hogsmeade today, either...Maybe i'll go by myself. Yes, I think I will...

**September 9, 10:27 a.m.  
Hogsmeade Bench**

I'm bored. You know just when i thought-NO! Potter is headed this way! What does the bloody git want! WHY ME!


	9. Coffee Shops

**September 8, ****7:18 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

Just like I thought, Sarah is avoiding both Evie and I, she obliviously senses the tension. What she doesn't know is how much tension there is. She's lucky she doesn't or she'd have a permanent headache...

**September 8, ****11:57 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

Sarah found a new clique to hang in, the Ditz clique. The Oh My Merlin Were Better Than Everybody Else Clique. I wonder if she really feels that way?

**September 9, ****6:56 a.m.  
****Dining Hall**

Evie hanging with different friends . All of them batter themselves up in some way: Anorexia, Bulimia, Cutting, Depression, you name it someone has it. Well? What about me? I'm now officially a loner. It's too bad to, cause I feel in a pretty good mood today...I wouldn't mind going to Hogsmeade today, either...Maybe i'll go by myself. Yes, I think I will...

**September 9, ****10:27 a.m.  
****Hogsmeade Bench**

I'm bored. You know just when i thought-NO! Potter is headed this way! What does the bloody git want? WHY ME?

**September 9**, **11:12 a.m.  
****Coffee Shop**

I can't believe I let Potter buy me a drink. I can't believe I let bloody Potter buy me a blood red drink. I can't believe even a blood red drink reminds me of Marie. I can't believe i'm about to spew. I can't believe i'm still writing when i'm about to hurl.

**September 9, ****11:16 a.m.  
****Coffe Shop Loo**

I hurled. Thankfully I made it to the loo in time.


End file.
